Defining Self-Worth
Tuesday May 20, 2008
8:34 P.M.
Seth… Good evening.
All… Good evening.
Seth… Glad to have you all here. Depending upon how this session goes, it will either be short or long. (Isabella was trying to open a plastic package and having difficulty.) Whenever you are finished crinkling (Isabella laughing.) and decide to take notes we shall continue.
We shall make a brief pause; I can do some housekeeping work. The first thing I would like to touch on is replacement. George, in terms of housekeeping ideas, it would be incorrect for you to replace one animal with another, especially at this point of reference. (George, a veterinarian recently lost his German Shepard. He brought over an adorable German Shepard puppy who had lost some motor functioning due to vaccinations that he was nursing back to health.) And if the reason is not obvious to you, I believe we have an eminent master in the subject of animal replacement who happens to be sitting at the table this evening and I am sure Kaetorina may give a long dissertation on that specific subject. (Stephanie lost her cat several years ago and is only now considering getting a new cat as her daughter was learning to discern between bereavement and really valuing the cat.) That is the first bit that you have to understand. I am not saying not to love the animal or care for the animal but the replacement idea is quite detrimental.
Second bit of housekeeping goes to you, Isabella, one, you do know that you still have another session to type up?
Isabella… Em hmm.
Seth… Second of all, when you are indeed typing up the sessions, they are not complete until you re-listen to the entire session from beginning to end and make your proper corrections therein. Since it is incumbent upon you to do things in a correct manner, if you were grading a student’s paper with the amount of corrections, omissions and additions that you have done in session 358 you would give it an F. (There was a giggle.) And that is because you certainly to put it mildly rushed through it.
Isabella… I had to.
Seth… In the future, I will count it as incomplete so, you must be aware that you are doing this if you are going to do this with a…
Isabella… Full heart.
Seth… No, with a careful tone. Words that are changed give different meanings and since my ideas and meanings are used to convey specific ideas and since language itself is one of the poorest forms of communication you do not want to embellish upon that.
All that being stated, I will out of what I believe is necessity under our general topic of “Change”, change my lecture from what it was, and I will give it at a different point of reference to the idea here of Self-Worth.
I noticed quite carefully that you did not look up the reference point for that Isabella, did you?
Isabella… I didn’t know that was a task.
Seth… Did I not ask you to do it?
Isabella… I didn’t remember if you saying I had to… I didn’t remember.
Jasmine… What to look up self-worth?
Seth… Yes, therefore what I am going to have each of you do is to literally define your self-worth and we shall pass the microphone around and we shall do that. Betty, would you like to go first or last?
Betty… (By speaker phone,) Umm, last.
Seth… Good I am glad you decided to go first (Group laughter.) go ahead.
Betty… Who me?
Seth… Yes.
Betty… How would I define my self-worth?
Seth… Yes, how would you define yourself in terms of your own self-worth?
Betty… In terms of how I think about myself in a positive way and how I interact with others in a positive way.
Seth… How do you define self-worth? If somebody says, define yourself in terms of what you believe about yourself… Betty? (The puppy was barking.)
Betty… I believe… it’s hard for me to do (Inaudible.) I see myself as what it is I have to offer to others.
Seth… We’ll let it go. Kaetorina, start and pass it.
Stephanie… Why I would think I am worthy? Has to do with the idea that I assist people, help people. I feel that makes me worthy and important and valuable and all of that, healing and the helping piece. Whatever I can contribute to the world I feel makes me valuable and worthy… And what I can offer; I think that is the same thing.
Seth… Pass it along.
George… Self-worth is defined by somehow how good a life I am living, what I am doing, what I feel I can be doing for society and for myself and how completely I am living spending the time I have on this planet.
Jasmine… To me talking specifically about my self-worth, I think that I have come a long way in feeling more worthy than I ever did before through a lot of work that I have been doing. I’ve always felt worthy in my profession and had a lot of insecurities in other areas of my life, but I feel like I’m making some headway there, I still have more to do.
Frank… I feel I define my self-worth in terms of how the work is going as a therapist, how things are going as a parent and husband, how things are going in terms of where I am at with the spiritual work and etcetera.
Isabella… As per our conversation yesterday I apparently have no self-worth. (Said a bit dryly as Isabella just discussed these issues with Seth yesterday.)
Seth… Let us now and while I am saying these comments, I would suggest to you, Isabella, you go upstairs, bring down a dictionary and be prepared to read it. If you do not know where it is, I will give you some guidance.
Jasmine… I don’t think that self-worth will be in the dictionary, or worthiness maybe.
Seth… Let me ask you which gives a good point to a question, Jasmine.
Jasmine… Yes.
Seth… Do you think I would send Isabella upstairs to find the dictionary if I did not know that the word “self-worth” was there?
Jasmine… I guess not.
Seth… I believe we have now scored Seth, one, and Jasmine, zero.
You would be amazed to note that the dictionary definition here is quite poor and I will deal with that in a moment. (Isabella was back with the dictionary.) If you would look under the idea of self-worth and then please read it out loud, we shall be able to continue.
(Isabella going through pages.) I suggest you start with the word “self”.
Isabella… Thank you.
Frank… When’s the last time you used the dictionary?
Isabella… Today actually.
Seth… Here we go.
Isabella… One’s worth as a person as perceived by one’s self.
Seth… Thank you. (The microphone fell into Isabella’s drink and people reacted.)
Which in reality (Sound was compromised.) worth can be divided or subdivided into so many categories that the idea becomes practically meaningless. Your definitions were obviously woefully inadequate.
Now, how you define yourself depends upon what reference point one looks at in terms of the situation that you are in. One may define themselves for example as a parent in certain ways. One may define themselves as a teacher, as a helper, yet the definition of self-worth is lacking no matter how you define yourself because of the fact that change dictates that you are different in whatever you do. The idea of a definition of self is problematical since it puts finite limits on your understanding of any particular situation.
A better idea would be the understanding of that which you do in a situation defines that which you are. An example here, if you see someone who is obviously in need, but you know that you cannot assist them. The question arises, what do you do? What is your self-worth then if you do nothing as compared to the self who takes the energy and ‘time” to have someone assist that other person? When one gives of themselves, one is then able to create that which another requires. But more importantly, it allows one to create for themselves a feeling of importance that you did not previously have.
Are you the individual who is critical, first of others and then of self? How often do these individuals point fingers at someone else and say, “Why didn’t you do me a favor? Can’t you understand where I am coming from? Why are you picking on me?”
These individuals routinely demean themselves and others. So, the question arises, what is their self-worth? When you as an individual allow someone to demean you, what are you telling yourself? How can one proceed to increase their self-worth when one makes no attempt to reconcile the opposing arguments that others give you?
Isabella… (Asked a question about being confronted.)
Seth… You allow someone to criticize you and you don’t respond. The idea of diminished obviously means to make smaller. When you are diminished by another’s actions and certainly your own inaction you have given away your power. You have moved away from that which you require to promote your own growth and development. This by no means should prevent anyone from giving justifiable criticism. It certainly does not mean that if you have made an error that you should not be willing to accept the criticism and CHANGE your position on any given subject.
Isabella… How can you tell the difference between destructive criticism and criticism that is helpful?
Seth… Criticism that is harmful is usually given out of anger. Do you understand? Criticism that is constructive is given in terms of, you did this, this is what I understand it to mean yet I believe this would have been better. Can you look at from a different point of view? That is constructive criticism. I believe you will get further if you do it this way than that way; but then when somebody who would say to another, “You say that to me why can’t I say that to you?” That is not constructive criticism. That is someone saying something in anger to get back at another to force them to feel diminished. Therefore, your own self-worth in accepting constructive criticism increases since it then becomes possible for you to make a change.
Destructive criticism diminishes your own self-worth should you choose to accept it. A clear example of this may be seen in the battered wife syndrome. Questions always arise, why did you stay there so long? Why don’t you walk out? When the individual does not walk out or walk away because their own self-worth is so small that they cannot reconcile the idea that the other is detrimental to them for they “WANT”!
(Someone asked a question.)
Seth… No, they want, the individual wants. They want them to like them, they want them to need them, they want them to accept them, they want them to love, hug, they want them to take their side. These are the issues that diminish not only their self-worth but yours as well.
Jasmine… How do you get…
Seth… If you have to victimize somebody, then what do you think about yourself?
Isabella… But why is that though? Why do people… What is the idea of the man who abuses or woman for that matter? Or the idea of being physically and mentally abusive. What is the gain there? Why do they do it?
Seth… The gain there is because they feel so small, so unimportant that they cannot sustain themselves by normal means and since you feel weak, powerless you then must increase or you believe that you can, (Seth hit table with finger for people to take notes.) you then must increase your own importance by making others subservient to you. It is the boss who will not admit his/her mistakes and demeans their employees and tells them they are inferior uneducated, improper, childish to promote themselves since they cannot face the mistake or error in judgment that they have made. Does that answer your question?
Isabella… Yes. It is hard for me to visualize that because I don’t see myself as being the abuser. I mean I know I have been on the other end of it.
Seth… Same thing.
Isabella… Right.
Seth… When you have something done to you the tendency is to do it to someone else. Therefore, you do it to other people that you find are safe and that is how it starts, and it starts with always lashing out instead of asking questions, “What did you mean? This is what I heard, what did you mean?”
Isabella… So, okay.
Seth… So, you start to lash out, you demean them, you don’t feel good about yourself from what they stated or said, your self-worth is diminished therefore you lash out to make their self-worth less then yours, you then feel more important because you “believe”, quotes here, you “believe” you won!
Isabella… You’re a victim of belief, hence belief.
Seth… Always, in many forms because their self-worth is so diminished.
Isabella… So, in my situation with John, and when I was abused by him in the beginning when I was younger, is that why I became such a tough teenager?
Seth… Correct.
Isabella… Because I was feeling …
Seth… Your actions towards other boyfriends, your husband, your parents, friends all can be connectable to the idea of self-worth, here.
Isabella… Because I was abused by him in the beginning?
Seth… Correct.
Isabella… So, had that not happened?
Seth… It happened and we are not going to speculate, had it happened, might had happened, should have happened…
Isabella… So, I learned self-worth through that relationship obviously or lost self-worth through that relationship and then in turn tried to gain my own self-worth in negative ways.
Seth… In inappropriate ways. You understand? When someone says something or anything that you do not understand, like or are bothered by, now you feel diminished. You then go ahead and then instead of lashing out before you utter a sound you make a statement, “I heard this, did you mean it and if so, why?” You understand? I believe that will certainly help you.
Isabella… (Was very difficult as the microphone remained compromised to hear but the question had to do with getting angry.)
Seth… It is giving you a chance to understand. Again, I repeat the worse form of communications is words whether written or spoken since there are so many meanings to that word. If you will look at the dictionary definition again of self-worth, does it mean what you have now come to understand? Therefore, words are a poor form of communication because they often do not give you that which you require.
When you do not feel good about self you tend to camouflage it, you cover it over, you do things to prevent yourself from having the ability to change, such as I always lash out, I’m always angry, I always look at the worst part of things, I believe there is not enough.
Isabella… How is that camouflage though?
Seth… Because there is always enough. Self-worth itself should routinely be evaluated. What are you? How do you look at yourself? And this self study if you will is mandatory if growth is to occur. The old soul routinely examines who and what he/she is. They digest material and present it as an opportunity to themselves as well as others. The old soul rarely lashes out since anger leads to nothing but suffering and suffering occurs both on the victim’s part and the giver’s part.
(There was a question by Stephanie involving old souls being victimized by young souls.)
Seth… They allow themselves to become a victim of younger souls here because they are so easily taken advantage of.
Each of you should go back and look at your answer to my question. How do you define yourself? What is your self-worth? And if you do not like what you see, what is your plan to change? Are you routinely giving away your power? What do you do? What actions will you take to improve? Are you too heavy? Do you smoke? Are you overwhelmingly critical of others? Do you lash out? Are you intolerant? These questions are necessary if change is to take place.
The question arises, how good do you truly feel about yourself? Do you enjoy you? Do you enjoy you?! And for most the answer will be, “No, I know there is room for improvement.” Then to increase your self-worth, what are you willing to do to redefine that which you are. (It is here that the sound dramatically improved, the water in the microphone must have cleared.) Are your chance encounters the same? Do you attract the same difficulties and challenges over and over again? Have you asked yourself, how long, how long? And the simplest answer of them all is obvious. How long?
I believe at this point we shall take a break.
(Break 9:14 P.M.)
Seth… Let us continue. Frank, I believe that I must thank you for volunteering to type this session as well. (Stephanie giggled.) I am stating this for a reason you obviously do not find obvious or clear. After you type this session, screen it carefully, look at any typing errors and make sure that the words are exact. I would strongly suggest that you print a copy and give it to your daughter.
Frank… Okay.
Seth… She will do wonders with it; I would suggest moving out after that but… (Laughter.) It is really necessary for her growth and development because I think the idea of confrontation, this of course you will type in as well, works both ways.
Frank… Yes.
Seth… There are obvious errors that you have made, obvious errors that she makes and believe that a fair discussion on each side of the aisle if you will here, will be necessary to allow both of you to mend your wounds. And I believe that if she will read it at all the idea of an open line of communication would be helpful and therefore, I would suggest that you go ahead and ask her to read this and then say as soon as you finish, I would like to have a small discussion with you upon the lecture that was given. I believe that will help you tremendously.
Frank… So, I can type it up first because I was going to have a conversation (with her shortly.)
Seth… Yes, I would certainly do that. And that is the reason why I have asked you to volunteer, and I am so glad that you did.
Frank… I appreciated the last two that I am almost done typing them up.
Seth… Perfectly fine, aren’t you glad I didn’t make you do it, Isabella?
Isabella… I have so much work going on right now, you have no idea. I haven’t finished “The Secret”, I haven’t typed a session and…
Frank… I think he knows. (Frank laughs.)
Seth… Do you think that would stop me?
Isabella… No but I’m just…
Seth… Well, it could be next week too!
Isabella… Please don’t.
Seth… And Jasmine you will eventually have to do one as well.
Isabella… Oh goodie! (The group laughed as Jasmine did not look so happy.)
I will help you.
Frank… (To Jasmine) What did you say to me three months ago when I mentioned typing up a session?
Seth… Now, are there any questions?
Isabella… George said that through all of his veterinarian work and studying he wants to type sessions also! (Group laughter.)
Frank… Oh, you are so helpful. (Isabella laughed.)
Seth… Oh well, we will allow him to do one after you do the next four.
Isabella… Really. (To George.) Ain’t no doubt, honey. (Laughs.)
Seth… Let us move along, are there any other questions?
George… Can they be off topic questions?
Seth… You can go ahead and make them on topic because at least for now I believe the idea of self-worth is quite important.
Stephanie… Bill asked me to ask you a question and is it sufficient to use this lecture as the answer?
Seth… I believe that a large portion of this is due to the fact, you may write this down.
Stephanie… Oh, okay.
Seth… It would be nice. (Stephanie laughs.) A large portion of his definition for himself of his own self-worth is due to his diminished ability to look at, question and understand his parents’ role in his existence. When one is frightened by their parents the question of love becomes difficult at best. Love on the physical plane can be described as a compromise, if you do this, I will provide you with that. If you help me, I will help you. When love becomes demanding, very commonly individuals close off. They wall themselves to prevent hurt. They change who and what they are. This individual will routinely make excuses for the other.
Stephanie… For the other, meaning the parent?
Seth… Meaning the parent.
Isabella… Does it have to be a parent, or can it be somebody else?
Seth… For the other. They over exaggerate even the smallest kindness or activity that has been thrown to them. They refuse to become angry when they are routinely hurt. They bury their feelings. Their camouflage system does not allow any change to occur. They truly become victims of themselves out of fear of losing what they believe they have. Comments such as, “I don’t want to hurt them. They’re too old, they cannot change their ways,” “We’re just not a close family,” all deceive our victim. What is their self-worth? Most commonly these individuals have large social problems. They do not know how to make and keep friends. They believe that individuals are their friends when in reality they are just casual observers. They work for individuals who victimize them and their friendships at work are few and far between. Their relationships with their family are poor. Their dealings with their husband/wife are often seen as a battleground. They attempt to live through their children, and they tend to victimize others whenever they feel poorly or diminished by someone else. They have no true concept of the word, love! They deny the existence of their own feelings. They do not understand the true meaning of loyalty and friendship. Simply put, they live in fear!
I believe that should hold him. (Stephanie laughed.)
Stephanie… I would say so.
Isabella… I’m a little confused as to who these people are and how do they become this way.
Seth… You believe…
Isabella… Like, who are these people?
Seth… Who are which people?
Isabella… Who are the people that you are talking about here that… (Isabella rustling through her notes,) “Love becomes demanding, individual wall off to prevent hurt, they change who and what they are, they will make excuses for others, they over exaggerate even the smallest kindness.” Whose “they”, like how does the person become this person?
Seth… When you live within a family background where love is demanded in certain ways, if you love me, you will take sides with me. You will do with what I tell you to do. You will make sure that if I dislike that person, you will dislike that person and if you don’t, I will withdraw my love from you.
Isabella… So those people who become this, have social problems all based on… family…
Seth… Sounds familiar?
Frank… A little bit.
Seth… I thought it might.
Isabella… All based on family upbringing?
Seth… Family dynamics.
Isabella… So, this idea of not being able to, I’m thinking even more of like Jacob in that respect even with the inability to have feelings or love and in any way…
Seth… Feel free to send him a copy of this lecture. (Stephanie laughed.)
Isabella… Yeah. Social, but he didn’t really have social problems or so he didn’t believe that he did. I guess the attempt to victimize others whenever they feel poorly, they don’t understand the true meaning of loyalty and friendship. This is all based on having a family… a background of family dynamics?
Seth… It is what they digested as they grew up.
Isabella… And we were trying to put that on to me because I don’t feel that was… that I had that growing up, that severe.
Seth… It is a question of degree.
Isabella… Right.
Seth… If you did not align yourself with one party what did that party do to you?
Isabella… I know you say withdraw love, but I don’t remember it that way. Do you know what I mean? I don’t remember it as withdrawing love.
Seth… Depending upon how your definition of love is, I believe you can have this discussion with Kaetorina or your therapist at your leisure. (Isabella laughed.)
Are there any other questions?
Stephanie… Well we’re talking about Bill here…
Seth… Part of you…
Stephanie… As part of me, right. So, he is going to say haven’t I made progress?
Seth… And the question is what does the word progress mean? In other words, if you have for example a journey of a thousand miles, we use an old example, and you take one step, have you not made progress to complete that journey?
Stephanie… Yeah! (Said in a way that was tongue in cheek.)
Seth… The question is what does that mean and it obviously means nothing.
Stephanie… Right, any true progress would be just getting away from these people.
Seth… No, true progress is not getting away, it is learning to confront in a proper and justifiable manner. True progress is learning to confront in a kind and justifiable manner.
Stephanie… Okay, so then he would want to ask did he do that today with his boss.
Seth… It is not for me to say; it is for him to say.
Stephanie… Oh. He’s going to say I knew you were going to say that. (Group laughter.)
Frank… He doesn’t even have to be here.
Stephanie… Okay, let’s say he did do that, alright then isn’t that true progress though?
Seth… What does the word “true progress” mean?
Stephanie… That he confronted…
Seth… If he has taken two steps but taken nine backwards how much progress has he made?
Stephanie… Alright, not much.
Seth… I understand.
George… I have a question about not allowing yourself to be victimized and standing up for yourself to promote what you need.
Seth… Let us ask you a simple question, when you desired to make a change for yourself and you wanted to redefine how you looked at you and you did, what happened?
George… You mean my… (Not clear.)
Seth… To you, what happened with and to you?
George… (Paused and did not speak.)
Seth… Do you see how you define yourself poorly in terms of self-worth?
George… Oh, yeah.
Seth… The answer should have been obvious. I’ll give you a hint, has a number three with concern with it. (Looking at Isabella who was going to answer.) Don’t!… Yes, you were trying.
Isabella… I wasn’t trying, I just realized. (Stephanie giggled.)
George… I don’t know, I’m not going to get this.
Seth… Well, let us go back a few months ago. If I give you the word lists and placement does that help?
George… Em hmm.
Seth… Does that help? What does it mean?
George… That was when I was deciding where I wanted to go and how I was…
Seth… And what happened when you decided to redefine yourself?
George… I didn’t really redefine myself.
Seth… Sure, you did, otherwise nothing would have happened.
George… Nothing did happen with that.
(Seth and Isabella said, “Really!” at the same time and Frank chuckled.)
Seth… We will end this at this point, and I believe Kaetorina will have a lovely time with you on whatever night you see her. Give us a moment, Thursday.
George… Can I still ask my question?
Seth… Now you can.
George… In terms of
Seth… (To Isabella.) Do not give an answer!
Isabella… Okay. I won’t.
George… In promoting yourself I have had a couple of situations with people at work recently where I have sort of stood up and not acquiesced to what other people asked of me because my personal feelings were that they were unreasonable and…
Seth… Did you say this is unreasonable?
George… Yeah, I did that, and I don’t think that they understood.
Seth… Did you explain why you believed it was unreasonable?
George… I did.
Seth… Then at the end of your explanation did you ask a simple question? “Do you understand where I am coming from?”
George… No, I didn’t ask that.
Seth… Then how did you know that they understood?
George… I don’t think they were very receptive to understanding my point of view.
Seth… It is not even a question of that. Let’s assume they were not, did you simply say, “Do you understand where I am coming from?”
George… No.
Seth… And my question is then why bother even making a statement. If you have no idea whether an individual understands you, why make a statement? Does that make sense to you? In other words, if you ask me for example, how do I go ahead and I change my life and I answer you… harumagggchua…. (Seth went on with gibberish sounds.) Did you understand that?
George… Not most of it. (Group laughter.)
Frank… That should be interesting to type… harumagggchua…
Seth… And you can obviously say Seth said…
Stephanie… Japanese.
George… Gibberish.
Seth… Said Gibberish.
But you had no concept of what I said. Yet, I know that I did answer you correctly from that statement but since you have no idea where I am coming from or what I said why was it necessary for you to let it go? Which is what happens when you explain your side of a difference and you then say nothing, you assume that the other individual either agrees with you, hates you or whatever. So, the point of it is what is your self-worth there if you take no care about yourself and do not stand up for yourself and say, “Do you understand where I am coming from? And if you do not, I would like a chance to explain it to you in a way that is calm so that you can understand where I am coming from. I am not asking you to agree with me, I am asking you to understand.” Do you see the difference? Did that answer your question?
George… In terms of what I should do…
Seth… Do you understand?
George… Yes.
Seth… Are there any other questions?
Isabella… So, how does one go about changing…
Seth… (Seth repeated while he handed Isabella the microphone.) How does one go about changing…
Isabella… themselves and understanding the dynamic that their past or that their family or past relationships have had on them?
Seth… Do you remember the beginning portion of this lecture?
Isabella… Yes.
Seth… When I gave you that answer?
Isabella… Um, “One may define…”
Seth… I don’t ask you to read it now, but I did give you that exact answer in the beginning portion of this lecture. One must be slow, one must take a step backwards, one must ask, do you remember this?
Isabella… But I wrote everything in the beginning, so I don’t know why I missed that.
Seth… I cannot answer that question.
Isabella… So, it’s just really understanding the dynamic and…
Seth… When someone says something to you that you have difficulty with and I am repeating myself, if you do not understand them you take a step backwards and simply state, this is what I heard you say, this is what I believe you meant if it isn’t could you explain it to me.
Isabella… I understand that but in…
Seth… That is how change occurs.
Isabella… But how does one go about improving their self-worth?
Seth… You improve your self-worth by getting clarification as an action occurs. Remember I have always stated that when one reacts one does not get anywhere. You approach each situation as if it was the first time. Do you understand? And that is how you proceed, for if you do not allow each situation to be anew then you do not gain, you are repeating again and again and again. So, each time you must approach something as if it was new and once your actions change your self-worth improves.
Isabella… So, in terms for me, relationships and negative relationships and being the victim…
Seth… Why look at negative relationships?
Isabella… Just relationships in general.
Seth… Why don’t you look at the positive relationships? Far too many individuals only concentrate on the negative situations.
Isabella… I’m just thinking about my repeating.
Seth… Far too many people only concentrate on the negative situation. One learns by understanding the positive, what works, if something works and it is profitable for you then it should be repeated. What causes you difficulty, what causes you not to improve are the negative aspects of learning. And so, you observe them and let them pass.
Isabella… So, in relationship to what we were talking about yesterday as well as today in this idea of my getting into relationships with people where I become a victim, I don’t see, I guess there have been so few relationships that I have had were I am not the victim, so it is so difficult… I feel that it is very difficult for me to learn from those positive experiences because there have been so few of them.
Seth… That’s why they are so important. Do not dismiss two out of ninety, use the two to eliminate the eighty-eight. Do you understand?
Are there any other questions?
Stephanie… (Stephanie was automatically handing the microphone to George.) Why am I’m giving it to you? You must have one.
George… Obviously, you think I need to ask more questions. (Group Laughter)
Frank… Here, ask a question.
Isabella… Ask.
Stephanie… Go ahead, ask.
George… I’m really struggling with the idea that I am looking for now all of a sudden having that my decision to stay on with my current job for another three years is a choice.
Seth… Correct.
George… And I guess I never really viewed it as a choice and obviously I am having a lot of second thoughts.
Seth… Third thoughts.
George… Third thoughts.
Seth… Fourth thoughts. Is that not something you were looking forward to doing?
Your fear is that you are not worthy and that you don’t have the ability. If you would like to go through the rest of your life with that knowledge, please quit. (A couple of people said, “Whoa” and then there was a long pause.)
Frank… A hush fell over the audience.
Stephanie… Is he creating imagined difficulty?
Seth… Let us assume that this is a very, very difficult program.
Stephanie… Which it is.
Seth… Let us also assume that he has some intelligence.
Stephanie… Which he does.
Seth… Let us assume he can use it.
George… So, it is self-doubt or the lack of discipline and mental strength to get…
Seth… Did you have the discipline to go to high school?
George… Yep.
Seth… College?
George… Yeah, sure.
Seth… Graduate School?
George… Got through it.
Seth… Did you not impress enough people so that you finally got what you desired?
George… Through as you said, an unusual path I guess…
Seth… It doesn’t matter, usual or unusual, did you not impress people to get what you wanted?
George… Yes.
Seth… Yes, I believe Seth, one, George, zero. (Laughter.)
Are there any other questions?
Isabella… This is great.
Seth… Thank you, they usually are. (Laughter.) I’m modest too.
Let me leave you all with this: Change is necessitated by how you define yourself. One must learn to define themselves from point of reference to point of reference, from situation to situation. In doing so your needs will be met, your wants lessened, and your stature will rise. By the next time we meet, may you all be taller and more self sufficient. I bid you all a very fond good evening.
(Session ended at 10.P.M.)
