Change and the Questioning Mind
Tuesday December 11, 2007
8:37 p.m.
Seth… Good evening.
Everyone… Good evening.
Seth… A pleasure to have you all with me again. Some housekeeping that we shall attempt to cover. Isabella feel free to ask questions.
Isabella… I am not asking a thing! Nothing!
Seth… You will never ask another question again. Is that what I am hearing?
Isabella… No but I am only asking in a private session.
Seth… So, in other words I can never expect you during a regular session to ever ask a question again? Be careful of what you say.
Isabella… No, just not on the early-stage level. (Frank is chuckling in the background.)
Seth… So therefore, you wouldn’t mind of course since you are not going to begin to type sessions.
Isabella… Would you like me to type the session?
Seth… I have no preference one way or another. You can start with session one hundred.
Isabella… No, no, I need a break. (Stephanie laughs.)
Seth… Then you do mind.
Isabella… I don’t want to have to keep having this banter back and forth because someone is going to have to type this. (Group laughter.)
Seth… Well, I just simply asked a question and you have not given me an answer. Do you want to type more sessions? Yes, or no?
Isabella… Um… you know that is a trick question. (Some group giggling.) It is because I don’t want to do it because of the tedious nature of it but that’s not my excuse. It was my fault because I left it for the last minute, and you know…
Seth… So therefore, you don’t mind if you did it properly.
Isabella… If I did it properly…
Seth… We will keep that in mind. Let’s move along. To our friend Frank, how is typing going?
Frank… (Big breath.) I have a lot of things, Seth.
Seth… By the next time we meet that session had better be done otherwise I shall assign you four.
Frank… (Somebody grunted.) We’re not meeting for three weeks, that’s not a problem. (Frank laughs.)
Seth… I know. (Group laughter.)
Frank… I’ll have it done by then, no problem.
Isabella… Three weeks goes fast, Frank.
Frank… That’s not the issue; believe me I’ll have it done.
Seth… We will be glad to see that finished and done with there.
Frank… Will you yell at Jerry for not finishing the other ones that I have typed that he hasn’t handed out?
Seth… Certainly, Jerry! Finish typing them! (Laughter.) Does that make you feel better?
Frank… Kind of.
Isabella… Can you find somebody else to do all the typing…
Frank… Ooh.
Isabella… besides Frank and I?
Seth… I assign what I believe that is necessary and that someone will get something out of it. And that session that you recently typed up if you listened to the ideas and the expressions that were there given you would have understood why I asked you to type up that session because that session was for you basically. (Note, Frank is typing all of the un-typed sessions on Change before Stephanie began transcribing beginning with Session 395 on February 10th, 2009. Doing so is assisting me in absorbing and understanding the material on a much deeper level and while this was always understood there is also a greater appreciation for the activity of typing. F.N.)
That being stated on our larger subject of Change we shall continue along. One of the ideas that one must learn to understand is the idea of questioning self and you must always understand that those who do not question themselves fall short in terms of their ability to comprehend, to make progress and to find the most profitable avenues that one can. As children you were taught acceptance of adult ideas and methods for obtaining any stated set of goals. When a child incorporates this behavior into themselves one tends to accept authority without question. It should be noted that accepting anything without question is indeed foolhardy. Therefore, the question arises, change itself is mandatory for success on the physical plane. Yet how does one change if one has been taught to accept and expect the powers that be to provide the “information” that you require? When an individual becomes dissatisfied, ill at ease if you will with the nature of things, then of course change although frightening becomes necessary. One must learn and certainly teach that the requirement for success is a questioning mind! Remember it is not what the question is but the ability to question that gives all those who inhabit the physical plane the ability to progress in any line of study. Far too many individuals have been taught that their questions are foolish, they are not important. To these individuals I state, how can learning occur when it is obvious that you do not understand?
One of the great benefits of our little round table discussions much to Isabella’s dismay is the ability to ask and receive information that you desire! A good argument is necessary at times for learning. Period. The challenges are necessary for without them you cannot learn. There are many who would state, I would like an easier life, look at them but why not me? My answer to them is clear; one must learn to break away from the usual. That which is routine, that which is common, that which is easy for most serves no useful purpose. One needs a challenge routinely so that their intellectual and creative abilities have and should be stimulated, first by self and then of course by others. So, let us ask a question, we shall go around if you will. What have you done recently to break away from the usual? And I believe some effort will be necessary from each of you to be able to answer that question properly and my statement is this if you have done nothing state it. Are you continuing in your same old way? Do we have a volunteer?
Isabella… I’ll volunteer.
Seth… And you may pass it along or if Betty wants to come in at any time she may.
Isabella… I actually feel I’ve done a few things out of the um, to break away from the usual for me. I’m trying very hard to live within the community and as per our private session that we had recently, I’ve been bringing in the newspaper every day for my parents.
Seth… Let me ask you a question. That is certainly breaking away from your usual routine. Now be fair to self, how much effort do you really put into bringing in the newspaper? Where one would be very easy and ten would be immensely difficult?
Isabella… Um, well… it’s not…
Seth… It’s not a trick question.
Isabella… No, no, no, it’s not that it’s hard to bring in the newspaper, it’s just out of the ordinary for me to do it.
Seth… So now that you have done it let’s say for one or two or three or four or how many days you’ve done it for…
Isabella… How difficult?
Seth… How difficult is it?
Isabella… It’s not difficult.
Seth… So, you would say it’s a one?
Isabella… Ah yeah, a one or a two.
Seth… What type of pleasure does that give you as an individual…
Isabella… At a one or a two?
Seth… No, no, the fact that you, did it?
Isabella… Tremendous.
Seth… Would you say nine and ten?
Isabella… Yeah.
Seth… So, we may, and we’ll write this down, we may see clearly that for most it does not take great effort to achieve greatness. The pleasure that one gets has nothing to do with the difficulty of the task!
Isabella… I also, oh.
Seth… I believe that we shall leave it go because it may take some time for everybody else. You may ask this later.
Isabella… I didn’t have a question. I was just going to say more things.
Seth… Unnecessary, you’ve succeeded well.
Would you like to go or…
Isabella… (I believe Isabella grabbed the microphone.) I’ve been a doing tremendous amount of effort! (Group laughter.)
Seth… Would you like to go although you do not have to Mary? (Mary is Frank’s sister.)
Mary… Um no, I’ll go. One of the major changes that I’ve done this year is that I started school. (Mary began school to become a massage therapist.) It was a big change for me and a…
Seth… So, what possessed you to attempt a major life altering decision?
Mary… Well, I have been doing hair for twenty something years and I decided I wanted a change. And I honestly feel that…
Seth… Your life became mundane, was routine.
Mary… Well somewhat. I don’t know. (Frank and Mary laughed.)
Seth… Then if you do not know why you did something the question must arise why did you do it?
Mary… Oh, because I honestly believe that I have an ability to heal.
Seth… Whether you have an ability to heal or not matters not. We are not talking about what you hope to accomplish we are talking about why you decided to do anything that was different, go back to school, not stay where you were. Remember doing let’s say someone’s hair and making them feel beautiful from the inside out is the same healing that you will have in terms of physically making them feel better by a massage. The beauty that one radiates from internally is just as important as the physical comfort you will give someone. You understand?
Mary… Em hmm.
Seth… So, the question falls back on to where it was. Why did you decide to go ahead and make the change?
Mary… Um, well I had in mind that I wanted to do it before my mother got sick.
Seth… Why?
Mary… Because I wanted to just do something different and…
Seth… Why? (Mary giggles a bit and may not be sure how to answer.)
Aren’t you sorry you said I would speak? (Everyone laughs.)
Mary… Well, honestly because I… I honestly believe that I could help people.
Seth… But you are helping people routinely in other fashions. Because as I stated earlier. People decide to do something that is life altering when they are unsatisfied with what they have been doing previously. And that is an important thing to write down.
Mary… Okay.
Seth… People, individuals decide to make life altering changes when they become unsatisfied on their current path.
Mary… Okay.
Isabella… Can people also make life altering changes out of fear?
Seth… Certainly, that is not usually as profitable but certainly.
Isabella… Like in Jacob’s case, obviously that was a life altering decision for him to leave.
Seth… I knew where this was going.
Isabella… So, (Laughs.) so it obviously wasn’t his… that’s not as profitable as…
Seth… Doing anything out of fear is never profitable.
Our friend Frank?
Frank… I’m not sure how much this is really “breaking away” but I think that meeting with Jerry and trying to deal with like difficulties with anger is somewhat of a shift. And…
Seth… Somewhat!?
Frank… Well…
Seth… Let me ask you a question…
Frank… What do you mean, the last seven years? (Laughs.)
Seth… Is this not one of the most difficult problems you have?
Frank… Yes, it is.
Seth… Is this not one that has plagued you?
Frank… Yes, it is.
Seth… Please explain to me how this is not life altering? The first step…
Frank… It has not been successful yet.
Seth… How do you know?
Frank… I don’t believe it’s been successful yet. I think there are some beginning changes, but I don’t… I don’t have proof that it is successful yet.
Seth… What proof do you need other than the fact that you have done it?
Frank… I need to see that I can stand up for self in different situations and that it’s, that it is not a problem for me.
Seth… And if I tell you that you have started to stand up for yourself?
Frank… I…
Seth… And that is all you need is the first step.
Frank… I believe that I have…
Seth… And I believe if you would get out of the forest and look at the sunshine with this issue, you’ll be far better off.
Frank… Okay.
Jasmine… I would say similarly that in my work with Stephanie I have become aware of many issues that were you know life affecting and I am presently working on making changes to those areas. But the awareness um has… the awareness of so many things has really helped.
Seth… Write this down, please. When individuals become aware that the changes that they are attempting are starting to take root the idea of change becomes less frightening. It is the questioning of self that allows you to review that which you are learning. You draw into yourself that which you require and discard that which is at that point of reference worthless to you.
Would you like to continue Jasmine?
Jasmine… No.
Shanna… Um, the first thing I thought of was that I just had to come out of my comfort zone. Recently last week when I had to teach a new class, you know that I was not comfortable teaching with initially, and I had to put a lot of effort into it and I just kind of forced myself to I don’t know, take a leap of faith in myself. So that was unusual for me.
Seth… That is of course, is the second point that we have dealt with. You are breaking away from the usual. So, when you come out from yourself, you can write this down. When one comes out from themselves their normal routine must be changed since it is impossible to continue on the same path if the routine is now different. If the routine is different, then of course you must be different.
More or less?
Shanna… I’ll tell you later because my question is in reference to this but…
Seth… Go ahead.
Shanna… In dealing with something out of the ordinary or the unusual, off the routine path could it also be something like not… doing like a habitual behavior pattern in a relationship?
Seth… Of course, that is one of the more difficult things to deal with.
Shanna… But what so… so if I did something out of the usual for me in my relationship with my husband but yet it was so not a profitable situation? (Laughs.)
Seth… Why does everything and you write this down. Why does everything that anyone does have to be profitable?
Shanna… Why does everything?
Jasmine… Anybody anything.
Seth… Do you believe that anything that everyone does has to be profitable?
Shanna… No, it doesn’t. I guess just because of the…
Seth… Let me finish.
Shanna… Okay.
Seth… The answer is quite simple. Without failure one cannot learn to appreciate success. And the more difficult portion of this is simple, you may have been correct and the other may have been incorrect…
Stephanie… And that’s why it wasn’t profitable.
Seth… That’s why it wasn’t profitable. Does that help?
Shanna… Yes.
Seth… Kaetorina?
Stephanie… Um…
Seth… Don’t worry Betty, I have not forgotten you.
Stephanie… One can say that I have taken the hugest leaps of my life, (Laughs.) in the past two months I would say. Out of the box would definitely be the idea of confronting my father with my entire life (Laughs.) and how he has treated me. And the other would definitely be stepping out of my beauty jail… that my father helped to create.
Seth… And again, I ask you the same questions that I ask Isabella. How hard was it for you to step out, we will ask the first one, the beauty jail?
Stephanie… Immensely.
Seth… And you are not out yet.
Stephanie… Right.
Seth… Moving along. How in comparing and contrasting with the beauty jail how hard was it for you to face up to your father’s inadequacies if you will?
Stephanie… Immensely.
Seth… You believe so, please explain why?
Stephanie… Because I was taught as a daughter, a child that one doesn’t do that to their parents and stand up for themselves and promote themselves over and above parents’ views and…
Seth… One does never question adult authority I believe I started with this, this evening.
Stephanie… Yes, you did. So…
Seth… How true is that statement now?
Stephanie… Not true at all.
Seth… And it should never have been true, and it should never be taught. One cannot work under, write this down. One should not have the erroneous belief that children should not ask. Now I am not stating here that individuals should not tell a young child, do not run into the street because there is a car coming. Nonsense. Of course, you do not allow someone who does not have the ability to make a rationale decision to injure themselves. For the most part children must always be encouraged to question. And our last and third point this evening one must learn to be honest with the questions you ask and how you interpret the answers that you receive.
Let us move to Betty. Betty?
Betty… Oh, yes.
Seth… You’re on.
Betty… I’m on. I have moved out of state, packed up a life and…
Seth… That was awhile ago, what have you done recently?
Betty… Recently? Um, probably from that starting to stand up for myself and probably most recently that’s been pushed to the point of fighting for myself.
Seth… How are you fighting for yourself?
Betty… I am actually taking… I’m about to write up a grievance on my lawyer.
Seth… And?
Betty… And probably on the work front in terms of what I am choosing to handle, turning patients away that I feel put me at risk for liability.
Seth… Honesty therefore becomes mandatory if one chooses to perceive change correctly. How can any individual choose a lie over the truth? Individuals do this out of fear and the refusal to look at their inadequacies and the delusions that they promote to themselves as well as to others. If one breaks away from the usual one tends to ask themselves questions that are honest. When one keeps to a strict routine, when one has behaviors that are repeatable, that occur again and again and again then one has great difficulty in terms of being honest, first to self and then of course to others. Ask questions. Do not accept the status quo. Change what must be changed knowing full well that fear will be your companion. But limit fear by knowing that in the larger sense of all ONE CANNOT FAIL!
I believe at this point we shall take a break. (9:21)
Seth… Are there any questions?
Isabella… I actually have one about chocolate. (Group laughter.)
Seth… A plethora.
Isabella… I’m really starting to get the hang of creating for self thing. At least I’m really working. Really consciously working on it and I’m just…
Seth… How’s “The Secret” going?
Isabella… I did read.
Seth… And when have you spoken with the man through whom I speak?
Isabella… We have not had time yet. But I have reminded him numerous times that I wanted to sit down and talk to him, so it is his fault not mine.
Seth… I disagree.
Isabella… Of course, you would.
Seth… Why would I disagree?
Isabella… Because you always disagree with me.
Seth… No. Because whose responsibility is it to get the work done…
Isabella… Yes.
Seth… his or yours?
Isabella… No, it’s mine.
Seth… Therefore, Seth one…
Isabella… Isabella none.
Seth… Zero.
Isabella… Okay. So, I’m interested in the experience that I have with the soda machine today was an example of creating?
Seth… Obviously. Next question.
Isabella… Okay. Um, and also in terms of aid is that also part of creating, of bringing what is necessary?
Seth… Of course.
Isabella… Okay. And…
Frank… Well, you’re working right through these!
Isabella… Fast. (Some giggling.) I wrote down some things. In terms of giving, being selfish can (Laughs.) you shed some light on that subject for me?
Seth… No.
Isabella… Why?
Seth… Whose responsibility is it to understand a statement?
Isabella… But I’m having difficulty understanding it, so I wanted to…
Seth… And how many people have others and the man through whom…
Isabella… Multiple! I have spoken to my father and Stephanie.
Seth… And how have they done so far?
Isabella… Very well.
Seth… Then continue on speaking with them.
Shanna… I don’t understand.
Isabella… I wanted to know how being giving was also being selfish. Yeah, when I can finally understand that is when I am done with this line of study?
Seth… No, but you will be well on your way to, and you will certainly…
Isabella… With the community that’s what you were saying. When I can finally understand that then the community piece will be… over.
Seth… No, I did not say (Isabella laughs.) over.
Isabella… Will be working towards. Um in reality to my children in school being very, very low functioning and weak, I’m wondering if there is… if you have any advice as to how I can better assist them to be successful.
Seth… One must learn to challenge.
Isabella… I do… I do though. I push them.
Seth… I guess it was not necessary for me to speak.
Isabella… No but I push them to the maximum of their potential…
Seth… That’s the problem. In terms of being a profitable teacher one must always understand that pushing an individual often serves no useful purpose. Let me tell you the story and it is a very simple one of the ideas of pushing an individual. Let us assume that you have information or the fact that you know you are correct and that in your opinion you believe that this other individual would profit from your knowledge shall we say. Yet that individual is hampered by an individual inability to comprehend or at least to deal with the information that you choose to present. Now a good teacher at that point takes a step backward and asks very simple questions. The teacher who is not good turns to ask and ram down the throat…
Stephanie… Are you using this example again?
Seth… When it fits, I use it, (Seth is referring to an example when Stephanie was insistent with information with a patient. Stephanie is grumbling good-naturedly.) and then rams down knowledge down the throat of another individual not only cannot listen but will not listen and will not assist the teacher in their efforts in terms of they walk away.
Isabella… Em.
Seth… In your case the student cannot walk away but effectively does by closing off. So, your object is to prevent the closing off or walking away in other instances so that you may approach them on a more simplistic level. You give to that student that which you already know they can do and then you increase the difficulty or the complexity if you will on a moment-to-moment basis.
Isabella… And that is pretty much what I am doing however they are required by New York State to pass an exam that… and it’s not just my classes it’s this sixth grade as a whole is very low functioning. It’s the cohort of kids which obviously they… this has been prearranged they decided on this before they incarnated. Um, I don’t know what purpose, why it is but supposedly this is the weakest grade that’s ever come through our school district. And so, I can’t, I have to not teach the way that I have been teaching in the best because they’re just not capable of acquiring the knowledge in the same way. So, I have changed a lot and I really do slow everything down and present it to them very differently, but they are responsible for taking this exam and I am having a lot of difficulty preparing them for it.
Seth… Then what you will start doing is you will start notifying the parents…
Isabella… Em.
Seth… of this. That you are going to be sending home a good deal of extra work and extra help so that these type of students as well it will benefit the entire class of course, will start doing at home in addition to whatever work you’re doing that they may be ready for a state exam since so many individual students require additional work on a topic or a subject.
Isabella… And why in particular is this group so weak? What is this arrangement?
Seth… The answer is because they are.
Isabella… So, they didn’t pre-choose this before they incarnated?
Seth… It is not a question of pre-choosing; each individual soul is an individual soul onto itself.
Isabella… Okay.
Seth… And therefore, because they are an individual soul onto themselves, they tend to fall into categories where it’s easy to say this is a very weak situation. But within that system itself are individuals who are very intelligent.
Isabella… There are but not…
Seth… Not enough to counterbalance I understand.
Isabella… Not at the same capacity that other years have had. It’s very, it’s very strange.
Seth… Remember the best way I can describe this to you is that the idea of a pendulum swinging. On one side you may get a whole grade that is very, very advanced and of course counterbalance that you will have areas where in certain years the grade is very poor.
Isabella… Okay, now just one last thing in regards to coming out of your comfort zone and kind of doing the unusual. Obviously, I’m recognizing that my old pattern of falling into the situation in a relationship and giving up other aspects of my life and I am just curious as to when I decided to talk to Shanna about not doing that and utilizing her help, would that be stepping out of the usual.
Seth… Of course, and it is also forces Shanna to step out from her usual comfort zone because she tends not to confront individuals who have bothered her.
Isabella… So that was good for both of us?
Seth… I believe I just said that. (Group laughter.)
Isabella… Okay.
Seth… Are there any other questions?
Shanna… Yeah, I have a question. Okay, I’m trying really hard to wrap my mind around this whole change thing in reference to my relationship with Philip. So, when in the beginning you said that when one has been taught to and expect things and that’s why it’s difficult for some people to change because the authority has always been there. Now that I relate to but in Philip’s case, I feel like his view won’t change because he’s always like there is no point in it. He was never really taught to accept and expect…
Seth… How many individuals were really taught to change is the question.
Shanna… None, but I’m just trying to understand where his viewpoint comes from.
Seth… His viewpoint comes to keep the status quo out of fear.
Shanna… Right, okay so… (Long pause.) is that why I see Philip as seeing change as negative because he’s scared?
Seth… Most individuals see change as negative. Remember change and its companion at times fear…
Shanna… Em hmm.
Seth… become devastating to individuals because they have become so use to a routine that any difference in that routine becomes frightening.
Shanna… Right but how do I help him see the other side of that?
Seth… Well, first of all one sees the other side by first of all, seeing what others do, going ahead and having an open line of communication is vastly important. Without that communication one to the other one tends never to choose the change especially when it is a couples’ difficulty. Since it is easier to accept the status quo in this or any instance and when one accepts the status quo, why should they change? She’s satisfied. I don’t have to worry. Yet if you keep a line of communication no matter how difficult it is and say this is not satisfactory, this is not profitable, this is not the way I would like to have my creativity patterns to be used. I would like to advance here, I would like a better home, I would like a house, I would like children.
Shanna… Well, that’s pretty much like you know what has happened recently is that I have expressed to him what you just said about how important I view change and where I want the change to go and how I want to… How certain things are not satisfactory, or they will not be satisfactory but he’s so uncomfortable so I don’t know where that leaves like…
Seth… Because someone is uncomfortable, what difference does it make?
Shanna… What I should have said…
Seth… Let me ask you a question.
Shanna… that, I should have really said that he is so comfortable.
Seth… No, he is uncomfortable with change.
Shanna… With change but he’s still comfortable where he is that he doesn’t want to change.
Seth… Because no one challenges him.
Shanna… Right, but now that I am starting to challenge him…
Seth… He becomes angry.
Shanna… Yeah.
Seth… And therefore, your tendency because you do not like to confront, you do not do arguments well, you tend to be shy, you tend, need I go on?
Shanna… No but sometimes it’s ah, you know…
Seth… I’m not saying you do not fight. (Shanna laughs.) I’m saying what your personality is.
Shanna… You know what it is? (Laughs.) It’s that the difficulty with Philip is that if I even attempt to fight with him on any subject matter he does not come out of his own orbit at any point.
Seth… Is that not a learned experience? Is that not the routine?
Shanna… Yeah!
Seth… Now therefore you have two choices. You do go to therapy.
Isabella… Well, that’s what we are doing.
Seth… And therefore, you fight it out there with a neutral third party.
Shanna… But he wouldn’t come with me last week.
Seth… What does that tell you?
Shanna… That he’s scared.
Seth… And what does that tell you long range if he refuses to go?
Shanna… Well, long range it’s… things tell me that it’s okay because he’s come back to therapy.
Seth… That’s not what I asked you. (Shanna laughs.) Please answer my question and not one you would like to make up.
Shanna… Well, no, only because he has major fears to deal with.
Seth… That is not what I asked.
Shanna… Then I don’t understand what you’re asking right now.
Seth… I asked you if he constantly refuses to go what long-range conclusions can you draw. Just because he came back once…
Shanna… Well, he didn’t go back yet.
Seth… Assuming that he does.
Shanna… Uh huh.
Seth… What long range conclusions if this behavior…
Shanna… That he doesn’t want to change.
Seth… And where will that leave you?
Shanna… Either having to accept it or not.
Seth… And do you choose to accept it?
Shanna… I may.
Seth… And if you choose to accept it why go back?
Shanna… To therapy?
Seth… Correct.
Shanna… I have to hope that things will change.
Seth… Praying and hope is want, and all you will get is praying and hope.
Shanna… So then why go back to therapy?
Seth… That’s what I asked you.
Shanna… Because things need to change.
Seth… Ah, then therefore you are unwilling to accept him as he is.
Shanna… Well, that’s what he says.
Seth… Is that something that is wrong?
Shanna… No.
Seth… A woman who is beaten by her husband because he doesn’t like the way she cooked dinner…
Shanna… Em hmm.
Seth… Is that an acceptable behavior?
Shanna… No.
Seth… Therefore, he must change if the behavior is to become acceptable. If things that you disagree with him about…
Shanna… Em hmm.
Seth… And we will assume for this purpose or this statement that you are correct.
Shanna… Em hmm.
Seth… If he refuses to change then you are acting and you agree with this, you are acting as the woman who has just been beaten by not making a good dinner.
Shanna… Right but what’s wrong with me having faith in him changing in the future?
Seth… One, that is not the subject that is under discussion, I will tend to tell you we are not speculating…
Shanna… Em hmm.
Seth… about what will be. I have made a simple statement to you that if he refuses to change where does that leave you and you have made a statement that you believe that things need to change because you are dissatisfied, remember the beginning portion my lecture with the status quo. If you accept the status quo you do not need to go into therapy and you may leave him be as he is in this lifetime and the next and the next and the next.
Shanna… Right.
Seth… If you believe that status quo must change, whose responsibility is it?
Shanna… Mine.
Seth… Where would you like to go from here? Other than you said that need for change is apparent to you…
Shanna… Em hmm.
Seth… You cannot accept the status quo and therefore if he does not change you are not willing to accept it.
Shanna… Right. So where is it like the time on that?
Seth… Why does there have to be a time?
Isabella… You’ll know.
Shanna… But that’s what I mean like…
Seth… Why does there have to be any mention in this room ever of time?
Shanna… So… I mean there’s, there’s no harm in me having patience with him needing to change.
Seth… Absolutely not and I encourage the patience, do I not have patience with you?
Shanna… Yes, now you do. (Laughs.)
Seth… I always do.
Shanna… Because I just, I just see it as him having such a fear to look within and to look even remotely at himself.
Seth… And whose job is it to help and assist?
Shanna… Help him?
Seth… Yes.
Shanna… Mine. Well, that’s what I am saying like that’s for me to be patient and say okay he’s going to come back to therapy and…
Seth… And I asked you a simple question, what happens if he doesn’t.
Shanna… Then I have to make a decision.
Seth… Yes, you do.
Shanna… Yeah.
Seth… Which is fearful for you because tht would cause change.
Shanna… Yeah, I mean it is and it isn’t fearful for me right now because I am still at the patient part.
Seth… We are not talking about that, and I applaud…
Isabella… You don’t even want to look at it, Shanna.
Seth… I don’t believe she asked you the question and when you turn about (Isabella laughs.) five to six billion years you have a right to make a statement. (Group is giggling.)
Isabella… I can tell her.
Seth… Not helpful.
Do you understand?
Shanna… Yeah.
Seth… I agree and applaud the idea of patience. I encourage patience. I encourage you to examine that which you are not satisfied with not that what our friend Frank would do (Shanna giggles.) but I encourage you to examine this and in doing so you will get a clearer indication of what for you and you alone will be able to tolerate or not.
Shanna… Right and I am settled at a high tolerance level right now.
Seth… There is nothing wrong with that.
Shanna… Right.
Seth… It wouldn’t matter if you said I have a very low tolerance.
Shanna… No, but that is where I am right now and if I was at a very low tolerance, I think I would be more fearful of…
Seth… No, not necessarily. Do not confuse the two. No.
Shanna… No.
Seth… No.
Shanna… Okay.
Seth… Did I assist in this matter, make matters far worse?
Shanna… No. (Laughs.)
Seth… Are there any other questions?
Betty… I have, well it seems like we are going around the table like some of the comments were that I am bouncing off I guess is the portion that follows me regarding the honesty, something that I particularly have to look at or is this more generalized?
Seth… Yes, in terms of your being more honest with yourself it is one of your great difficulties.
Betty… (Pause.) Could you say more about that?
Seth… One of the difficulties is when one wavers in their ideas and when one constantly reverts back to old behaviors if you will…
Betty… Okay.
Seth… Did I finish enough? (Frank giggles.) I believe I did, is there anything else Betty?
Betty… No.
Frank… I was, I understand what you said before, but I still wish to ask this question: in terms of anger and creative explosions and in terms of myself but then also like helping others as patients sometimes there doesn’t seem to be enough powder or things are mixed such that you don’t have enough to create the explosion if you will.
Seth… Whose difficulty, is it?
Frank… It would be….
Seth… Who are you describing right now?
Frank… Me!
Seth… Right.
Frank… Right.
Seth… And you don’t know when enough is enough.
Frank… No, I don’t.
Seth… And that’s one of the things where you will deal with the man through whom I speak to find out what enough is enough. (At this time Frank was meeting with Jerry on a regular basis working on a number of issues such as confrontation and anger.)
Frank… Okay, so just leave it at that at this point?
Seth… Yes.
Betty… That brings out something that occurs in general.
Seth… So that is, that is for most individuals a great difficulty, Betty.
Betty… That’s exactly where I am at.
Seth… I know.
Betty… When is enough enough?
Seth… That’s why I asked you the questions that I did. Are you finished, Betty?
Betty… I’ll listen, yes.
Seth… Are there any other questions?
Let me leave you with this: If on never questions themselves one keeps to their old routines, one is not honest then most assuredly your needs will fall by the wayside, you’ll be left wanting, your existence will be without profit and change becomes impossible. Do you see where this would help George?
Isabella… Yes.
Seth… I bid you all a very fond good evening.
(Session ended at 10:13 P.M.)
