Seth 384
Five Points on the Ethics of Change
Tuesday September 9, 2008
8:25 PM
Seth…. Good evening.
All… Good evening.
Seth…. Pleasure to have all of you here again. A small bit of housekeeping that we shall do, earlier today I gave Kaetorina in a semi-private session a great deal of information I have instructed her to type this information in as quick a form as possible so once she gets that information, I am sure that the man through whom I speak will be glad to pass it around.
That being said we are on our idea and subject of Change. Change for obvious reasons can be either appropriate or inappropriate, if you choose good or bad. One must learn that change must be held within the confines of an ethical system. Now just for our purposes we shall pass around the microphone and each of you will give what your interpretation of the word “Ethics” means. Betty, would you like to go first?
Betty… Okay, I guess a system of moral principles.
Isabella… Ethics are the idea of what is considered in quotation marks, “right or wrong.”
Arthur… Right or wrong according to a belief and value system. I guess I would also say it has to do with not, with respect and with not causing harm.
Frank… Moral rules, guidelines that one lives by or tries to.
Jasmine…. An ethical system would be a system where people choose to follow, as Frank said a moral way of living, where they have integrity or they don’t have integrity, where they make choices for the good of all.
Stephanie… Everything that people said and the word honorable came into my mind, just a system of values that would be honorable and integrity etcetera.
Seth…. One of the more interesting notions that I have concerns the idea itself of ethics. The question comes to pass, who makes up the rules that one considers moral? Who determines what is correct or incorrect? Every society chooses for themselves what they consider to be ethical or moral behavior. There are countries where prostitution is legal throughout the entire country. Where you reside, prostitution is legal in some places but illegal in others. What is the moral or ethical value of these type of systems?
Jasmine…. Could you restate that question again?
Seth…. What is the moral or ethical value of these type of systems? So, my question to you is, if you are going to change anything one must do so in an ethical manner. I find therefore that your ideas of ethics must be readjusted to allow you as an individual to prosper. My first point here in terms of an ethical change is to DO NO HARM, and you may write that in capital letters, do no harm and underline it. When one changes one must first realize that you are not existing by yourself. Whatever changes you make must be viewed by others and it automatically stands that as you change so must they. I have stated previously that as you change your past and your future adjusts automatically to the change. Questions arise, if one is not going to do any harm it is your responsibility, underline the word “your” to contemplate that which you are attempting to change so that you do not injure another. Now it should be noted here that one may give numerous examples where your change causes a problem with another. They may not like what you are doing but, that is perfectly acceptable! As long as your change does no harm, one does not need approval from others to change in an ethical manner.
The question then comes to each of you, what if the change is necessary but it appears that I am injuring someone else? Let us look at a simple example here, a father comes home and tells his wife and children that his company must relocate and if he agrees to go, he will get a promotion and a large increase in salary. And he believes that it is necessary to affect that type of a change. Is it ethical for him to uproot the other members of his family? And the answer in most cases is absolutely yes, for the “harm” that his family members will say he is causing is transitory; it does not induce or cause a permanent harm. So, one must be ethically sure that you do no harm; having individuals not like what you are doing is different from hurting them.
My second point to make an ethical change, again one must carefully reflect that what you do is to make sure that the change itself will make things better. Change for the sake of change is often disastrous. Individuals often believe that it does not matter what they do with the idea of transforming themselves into something else. The individual who lives through his children and causes their existence to change with his will does not make things better, for he is inflicting his value system upon someone else. The new boss in a firm who comes in and demands things be done in his/her way is obviously affecting change however, even if those changes would eventually be profitable the quickness of the change does not allow individuals to process or adjust to a new value system. Many of you have often asked why was this information given now when you could have given it years ago and the answer is simple. The change that I give to you causes you to reflect to study to contemplate areas of your existence that heretofore were unnoticed and unappreciated. You cannot appreciate that which you are not ready for. One must therefore allow individuals to move at their own pace so that they may adjust to the relative changes that are necessary in order for their incarnation to become prosperous.
My third point in ethical system of change, one must have and show respect to others. While this statement itself appears obvious, it is often one of the more difficult aspects of an ethical change. How often do you hear a parent saying to a child you will do this because I told you so? Even if the change is morally and physically necessary and correct, the lesson that is learned is that change is a demanded entity by itself and that authority dictates the necessity for change. How often have each of you heard stories of bosses saying, “Do it my way. I don’t care the way you have done it before.” How does this show respect for another’s intelligence? How does this allow the growth of a subordinate? If you are an individual who always dictates to, my question to you is do you really like yourself or are you afraid that others will see you for what you are?
Kindness, which is the backbone of charity is necessary for all individuals who request change of themselves and others. An individual who becomes so highly critical of themselves often finds it impossible to change since they effectively detest themselves and fear that they cannot succeed. Indications of this type of behavior are often seen in individuals who try to lose weight or stop smoking since the failure rate is quite high with these actions.
My fourth point, for any change to be considered an ethical act one must be fair. Your ideas first must be adequate for yourself. You cannot be fair to others when you are not fair to yourself. Often times people expect change to occur instantaneously, and so the question arises is that possible for change to occur instantaneously? And the answer is obviously, of course, for most positive change occurs instantaneously since the background of work has already been done. The person who has been a smoker for years and states, I am not going to smoke and puts down their cigarette believes that his change was instantaneous which of course it was, however what was the background, the decision making ability that allows our individual to make that change?
Jasmine… What was the background?
Seth…. Background to allow our individual to make that change. Did he do any reading on smoking? Did he listen to news reports? Did he see other people who were adversely affected by smoking? All of these answers are obvious. So, our individual was fair to himself because he incorporated all available information that made his change possible. The individual who hates must be fair to themselves and when our individual who hates learns that it is a belief system that is wrong, one’s expectations of someone else (Jasmine asked for the correct dictation.) cause hatred to appear. What are your expectations of this other person? When they fall short one learns to detest the idea that they cannot give you what you believe you require. It is the difference between what they are and what your expectations make you believe what they should be.
Jasmine…. Okay… (Stephanie laughs.) It is the difference between what they are?
Seth… What they are and what your expectations of these individuals are that causes you to expect a return. When they cannot give it one then states, “I hate that!” In reality hate is not an absence of love, hate is the difference of what you do not have or receive. Therefore, you are not fair to yourself in effecting a change where your expectations of others are so large that they cannot fulfill your desires.
My last point on ethical change, number five; be loving and this area of change must be viewed carefully. Physical plane love is not being loving. When one loves correctly one allows themselves the luxury of becoming themselves. When one loves correctly and you may review my lectures on this, one allows others to prosper. Change that is done in an ethical manner allows you and others to grow, to experience, to enjoy the grandeur of the physical plane. Your experiences within this context become manifest if you are truly a loving individual. Each path that you choose to take is always fraught with challenges and opportunities. When you find change that is necessary you will learn to love yourself, to embrace the challenge so that you as an individual will assist others who need to function in the same manner since their challenges…
Jasmine… Stop for a second, when you find change that is necessary you will learn to love self and embrace challenges so that you as an individual will assist others, that is as far as I got.
Stephanie… Who need to function in the same manner.
Seth…. Period. You will quickly note that their challenges will be similar to yours. You will learn to lend a helping hand for that is the greatest gift that you give. I’ve changed this way; I see you are having a similar problem. Let me to be loving enough to share my experiences with you.
It is at this point we shall take a break: (9:07)
Seth…. Let us continue. Since most of you are complaining that your hands are hurting, tired and falling asleep, therefore are there any questions?
Isabella… How do you know if the change, I am looking up point two which was, make sure the change you are making is going to be better. How do you know that the change you are going to make is going to be better?
Seth…. Well, it is an easy task, for example if you go ahead and have a choice when you have information. Is this information helpful to me? Would it be helpful to someone else? So, you can make a change based upon what you have. But if you have information and choose to make a change where you don’t know if the information will be helpful or hurtful to others then of course one must research, think about and formulate a course of action in slow steps. Do you understand?
You may make a certainly positive change for yourself, but would you make that change and the way in which you are making it if it hurts or harms someone else?
Isabella… No, but I think that’s a no-brainer. I mean I think that is obvious.
Seth…. No, it is not obvious, for many people do just that. They know information, whatever that information may be. Let us for example state that you knew information that one of your colleagues was not doing the proper work and you were doing more than your share of that work and you believed that a change in this attitude is necessary. Well, if one goes ahead and then says to everyone, “I am not doing this! I am not doing this because my partner was supposed to be doing this and is doing nothing.” That would hurt him or her. Therefore, what you would do is you would formulate a plan of action to assist yourself by first dealing in a fair and just manner with the other.
Isabella… Right, I understand that difference. I guess in terms of, I am trying to think in the situation with my ex-husband when he was trying to make a change, in as in leaving the marriage. I don’t feel that was an ethical or moral change.
Seth…. Was it?
Isabella… No.
Seth…. Was it hurtful?
Isabella… Yes.
Seth…. Was it a disaster?
Isabella… Yes, no.
Seth…. Yes, of course, it was because you lost something you were looking forward to.
Isabella… Yes, but I wouldn’t catastrophize it as the same as that.
Seth…. Oh, it was at that point…
Isabella… At the time it was.
Seth…. of reference, it certainly was.
Isabella… Right.
Seth…. So, go ahead.
Isabella… So, would there have been a way that he could have done that morally at that point?
Seth…. Of course.
Isabella… How? How could that have been moral or ethical?
Seth…. First of all, if there was a question that he was so dissatisfied, he would have then said to you, let us hold off.
Isabella… Em hmm.
Seth…. Two, let us go to and I hate to use this word a “therapist” (Stephanie laughs.) or as individuals here know that after years a therapist and a pill pusher were totally incorrect in what they were doing.
Isabella… Em hmm. So, there was, okay so he could have gone about it differently.
Seth…. Could of or should of?
Isabella… Should have, however the outcome probably would have been the same.
Seth…. We’ll never know…
Isabella… Okay.
Seth…. because if you made a change and he made a change then your outcome is not the same.
Isabella… Right, okay, I understand.
Seth…. When one becomes so fearful, which is what you are dealing with, that one runs away that change is hurtful. Does that make more sense to you now?
Yes, Kaetorina?
Stephanie… No, I was just thinking in reviewing the points, if you follow these points for example within relationships, couples, marriages, friends, whatever that one would think you would always be living in harmony because… But think about it. If you are talking about change, let’s say arguing ethically then…
Seth…. Are you talking about for example if you would like to go into the city and William does not want to go into the city and…
Stephanie… Right.
Seth…. you are getting into argument about this, is that something you would…
Stephanie… Alright, so you are not going to be hurtful, right? You are going to be doing whatever in a fair manner.
Seth…. And the word “compromise” must be included in your judgment values.
Stephanie… Right, so that’s what I am just saying, I’m just reflecting saying that if you use these points within difficult change crossroads and relationships or whatever.
Seth…. Will your incarnation be better?
Stephanie… I would say.
Seth…. I would certainly hope so; I gave you the information. (Stephanie laughs.) How you choose to use it is of course up to you.
Stephanie… Right.
Seth…. So, what is your question?
Stephanie… Well, I don’t know if I really have one, but I just wanted to comment. When you said, you know that the idea of change is instantaneous, now I really understand that point. It’s really not, I mean change okay is instantaneous, literally, but the idea of the fact that you have been working up to that change…
Seth…. You may have not have even been aware that you are working up to it. See that is the fallacy.
Stephanie… Right, em hmm, so…
Seth…. It is the inspiration that comes in a flash. This is what I have to do, this is the way it is going to be, this is how I am going to change. I will not do this. I will do that. That change is instantaneous from the background of all the thoughts, efforts and ideas that you have had over this and on this particular subject.
Stephanie… Okay but when you don’t make a successful change then what has gone on with all those ideas, etc, etc?
Seth…. You were not ready.
Stephanie… Because you haven’t taken the information profitably?
Seth…. No, because you are not ready. It’s that simple.
Isabella… You only make the change when you are ready to make the change?
Seth…. Correct.
Isabella… So, you can have as much information as you need, you can have, sit in a therapy session, you can sit here, you can do whatever…
Seth…. Let me ask you a question. Let’s start with that.
Isabella… (Laughs.) Yes?
Seth…. Why do I ask you to type sessions?
Isabella… To learn.
Seth…. And how many of the three that you have…
Isabella… Two! I don’t know where you are coming up with three.
Seth…. Oh, I will eventually show you the third.
Isabella… Okay, because I only know of two. (Group laughter.)
Seth…. My question to you is, are they given to you for a good reason?
Isabella… Yes.
Seth…. Was it a fair reason?
Isabella… Yes.
Seth…. Was it to promote you?
Isabella… Yes.
Seth…. Then let’s ask a question, were you ready to do it?
Isabella… No.
Seth…. Did you not state clearly on two separate occasions that they would be done before the end of summer?
Isabella… I might have.
Seth…. Would you care to rephrase that?
Isabella… I definitely said that. (Group laughs.)
Seth…. What date is the end of summer?
Isabella… September 21st.
Seth…. Are they going to be done by September 21st?
Isabella… Both of them? Probably not.
Seth…. Will one of them be done?
Isabella… Hopefully! (Stephanie and then Isabella laugh.)
Seth…. Do you need a time limit to spur you on?
Isabella… No, no I don’t want a time limit.
Seth…. It is coming close.
Isabella… Okay. I understand that and I do understand that you do type, I know because it’s interesting when I have typed sessions from the past that I end up typing them when I need the information, so I do understand that.
Seth…. Is there anything else?
Stephanie… I just want to make a statement though, the idea of the readiness piece, if the answer is always readiness, the lack there of then you are talking about that’s where no judgments come? So, so…
Seth…. Should I judge you because you have made the same mistake as a therapist for the last two years?
Stephanie… (Laughs.) No but let’s talk about the…
Seth…. Should I judge you because you tried to force things down patient’s throats?
Stephanie… No, let’s talk about this sociopath for a second, like the murder, the racist and all that.
Seth…. You are dealing with a completely different set of values. You are dealing with someone, and I have explained this to you before where the switches are so open that the value judgments are not taking place. (Seth has explained that there are switches that moderate between the physical being and nonphysical reality. So, for example those individuals who have schizophrenia often have open switches where there is too much information coming through like a thousand radios playing. Others may have other issues from switches being too open or too closed. F.N.)
Stephanie… Okay so everyone other than those kinds of people deal with the idea of there not achieving…
Seth…. And even they deal with change because they want change in their way. They put themselves so first that everyone else doesn’t matter.
Stephanie… Okay, but the idea of making profitable change when it doesn’t occur, you would not say because they weren’t ready, you…
Seth…. Their change is perfect, they may have chosen that life, they may have gone ahead and planned out to be a sociopath or a mass murder or whatever and they lived a very successful life. You’re judging by your set of values. I opened this discussion up by stating if you are a prostitute in New York, you get put in jail, if you are a prostitute in Holland you earn a very nice living.
Stephanie… (Laughs.) Right but we are not talking about the idea of, oh they have achieved what they set out to do. I’m talking about on the physical plane they are not being…
Seth…. They achieved what they set out to do. Are they following…
Stephanie… They are not following the ethical standards of society. (Isabella said something that was not audible.) So, none of this would apply to those people.
Seth…. That’s why their change is not ethical because they do harm.
Stephanie… Right, so… so…
Seth…. What is your problem?
Stephanie… So, I am stating because they have this difficulty, you’re still applying the idea that they are not ready to learn what’s more profitable and they continue on this path?
Seth…. Their readiness to learn is based upon what their life lessons and plans were, which may not have anything to do with what you are talking about.
Stephanie… So then how does this apply to them then?
Isabella… He says it doesn’t because…
Seth…. I am saying that some of it applies, some of it doesn’t. Just as I could go through these five points, and I could show you numerous examples where it didn’t apply to you.
Stephanie… It doesn’t, it wouldn’t apply?
Seth…. Parts of it do not apply to you. (Isabella is laughing and Stephanie laughs in what sounds like a frustrated but amused manner.)
Would you like an airing?
Stephanie… A what?
Seth…. An airing of your faults
Stephanie… (Laughs.) No that’s okay. We’re good on the faults subject.
Seth…. I believe we are about finished with that. Are there any other questions after your statements?
Isabella… I have a question, it’s off topic though.
Seth…. Anybody on topic?
Frank… Yeah, I’ll make a question/comment. So, the idea of being fair to self and kind to self would involve accepting one’s readiness?
Seth…. And one’s faults.
Frank… Why are you throwing that extra in there?
Seth…. Because you need it.
Frank… One needs to accept one’s faults?
Seth…. You can’t make a change without fault, why would you change something that is good?
Frank… You have to accept what you are, that’s the same thing.
Seth…. No, it’s not but it’s okay.
Frank… (Laughs.) Okay.
Seth…. Are there any other questions?
Frank… I have a question about a patient that somewhat fits in. A woman that I have mentioned before who really really was abused and hates self and she has an aspect of self that she even fights with, she’s punched herself, she calls it a very derisive kind of name. It almost seems, well it does seem actually that her hate is taking the form of a sub-personality. Is that a realistic assumption on my part and then what… I would imagine that you work with this just as you work with anything else with kindness and trying to move that part of that person along?
Seth…. One must get… the first thing that one must do is learn to love and enjoy themselves. You have to undo the fact that they were so abused that they hate themselves. Obvious I am a bad person because they did this and this and this to me.
Frank… Yes, I understand that, but she is getting attacked by herself at the same time and…
Seth…. Of course, she is because if you are abused and you are not a good person you deserve to be punished and who best to punish you then you.
Frank… But that part of self is being objectified and even almost sort of not of self.
Seth…. I understand what you are saying, and I have given you the answer whether you choose to accept it or not is vastly different.
Frank… I just want to make sure that I am saying it right.
Seth…. No, you’re not. (Frank is laughing.) You are bumping into a tree, you are walking the wrong way, you have information over here and you say, I’m going to go over here! Try over here.
Frank… Okay.
Stephanie… I want to ask a question about my son Peter, he had to do an assignment to put pictures on his little journal and I presented him with pictures whatever.
Seth…. Why did you do it? Presenting him with a picture, shouldn’t he be the one to find them?
Stephanie… No.
Seth…. Why?
Stephanie… Because they were mixed in with four hundred baby pictures. I took out pictures, laid them out and he picked out what he wanted. But I was concerned about it because he didn’t want me, he didn’t want Natalie, he didn’t want the cat, he only wanted his father and I don’t know, just sports. You know, he is concerned about how others, he worries about what he will look like to others. So, I don’t know whether he’s felt like the family, like if he promoted the family in his book that would be embarrassing?
Seth…. Who’s he trying to be?
Stephanie… Bill. So that’s what bothered me. (Group laughs loudly and then Stephanie giggles.) You know because how does he; it bothered me in and of itself.
Seth…. Do you understand the reason for the not coaching?
Stephanie… Ye-ah.
Seth…. This is all part of the same thing.
Stephanie… But he doesn’t appreciate me. He doesn’t appreciate Natalie…
Seth…. It matters not.
Stephanie… He doesn’t hold us in any esteem at all?
Seth…. You don’t… what you are doing is you are trying to say, I’m kind, I’m nice, I’m loving, he should appreciate it. And what I am saying to you is, he has learned the idea that to get his father’s approval to get the necessity of being what he chooses to be from his father, he will just honor his father. That will eventually change.
Stephanie… Yeah, that was very disturbing to me because I knew that. So, but even…
Seth…. See, I wasn’t even there, and I knew that. (Stephanie laughs.)
Stephanie… at the detriment though of his being able to appreciate the others around him?
Seth…. Right now, he is so enmeshed in pleasing the father that he has no choice.
Stephanie… Oh. Alright. Are there any other things besides what Bill has done whatever that could assist him in reversing it?
Seth…. Time.
Stephanie… Oh.
Seth…. Is there anything else?
Let me leave you with this: To effect an ethical change one must make their needs paramount. Follow the five ideas and when you become full you will find that your wants are gone. I bid you all a fond good evening.
All… Good night.
(Session ended at 9:43 P.M.)
